It's Real

It's Real...all of it
All the love, grace and mercy, it's real.
I thought the moment that i walked out of those white doors it was over.

I thought that once those red doors of that jeep closed with me inside there was no going back.
So for 3 months I lived trying to make it without you.
Playing Drake and Maroon 5 so that the world would love me and have mercy on me.
Breaking my neck for a 9 dollar an hour job that was 45 minutes away because it had the word government in it.

I was ready to sell myself to the government just to have a home again.

And then I said to myself "Since I am a free woman I minus well start living like one".
So I met a financially eligible bachelor online and my sale began.
The product a sweaty, passionate night in exchange for some rent money and a nice lunch.

But something hit me one day when I realized that board should have killed me on the 95 but it only took off my mirror and when I should have crashed in to the guard rail but there were no cars to my right so I was able to swerve.

I realized that You love me God to use Mormon missionaries to call back my attention to you.
I realized that where one may have left you provide another. You love me God to call me back and that proved to me that you are real.

I experienced the same fresh air today that I did when I was with my old church.
I even smiled the same because for some odd reason I just knew You were with me.
I now know that there is still a chance for me and that I don't have to be lost.
I know it's all real.